


cold bites

by ShatteredEpiphany



Series: eternal winter [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Oikawa Angst Fest 2k17, mood piece, winter themed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-09-18 15:59:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9392519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShatteredEpiphany/pseuds/ShatteredEpiphany
Summary: His hands were cold. Perpetually. His heart heavy, the wintry air biting at the exposed skin.





	

His hands were cold. Perpetually. His heart heavy, the wintry air biting at the exposed skin. Oikawa drew his flimsy coat tighter around his body. He should be going home, to warm up, if nothing else. He should, but he knew nothing was waiting there for him. What difference would it make if he was there now or in a couple hours? Or never?

He had to shake his head to get rid of the thoughts. No matter how far he sunk, he wouldn’t let them overpower him. He was better than this. Oikawa brought his hands up to his mouth and blew hot breath onto them. He was still here. His breath materializing into tiny wisps in the cold air around him was proof of that. Oikawa turned his head to gaze at the vast expanse of frozen water that was the river he crossed every day to and from work.

The majestic body of water was a constant in his life, deep and hiding long lost history underneath the surface. He remembered childhood summers, hazy with heat, spent on its shores. Exploring, sometimes taking a dive into the cool water, but never straying too far in. For the river, as calm as it sometimes appeared, was treacherous and its undercurrent fast. Oikawa wasn’t the cautious type, but he didn’t have to be back then. Iwaizumi was there to stop him any time he got too close, too curious.

As his thoughts strayed, Oikawa noted how muted the colors of the landscape were. Winter turned everything dull, the ice over the river was cool steel and the skies narrowly matched it. Snowflakes drifted to the muddy ground dissolving immediately. Oikawa leaned heavily against the railing of the bridge seeking support from the rickety metal structure. He closed his eyes leaning his head back letting the snow gently touch his face. It was anything but tender, though Oikawa liked to pretend.

Just how he liked to pretend that there wasn’t a hole in his heart in the shape of his childhood friend turned lover.

Oikawa stretched out his arms and pulled himself upright. His thoughts had strayed far enough. It had been three long years, three long and lonesome winters and Oikawa knew he needed to move on. But it seemed impossible, especially on days like this that reminded him of Iwaizumi the most. His sharp contrast to the cold winter weather. His warm hands that had enveloped Oikawa’s cold ones, his voice a quiet scolding tone chiding him about never wearing gloves or a hat and his small smiles only directed at Oikawa as they shared a coffee from the nearby café. It had been simple and sweet, until it all slipped away.

Oikawa stuffed his hands in his pockets searching for the last remnants of warmth as the memories took ahold of him. Instead in the pockets he touched upon the small tube that had been sitting there as long as he had owned the coat. Oikawa pulled it out and examined it with weary eyes and heart. A hand cream. Iwaizumi had bought it for him the winter they had finally gotten together. Oikawa’s hands were always covered in cold bites due to not wearing gloves, his skin rough and unpleasant to the touch. Tears gathered in Oikawa’s eyes unwillingly at the memory of Iwaizumi applying the cream for him on the cold bitten skin, his movements as gentle as ever, and the sweet kiss they shared afterwards.

Now there was no one to do that. No one to apply hand cream, no one to chide and care for him. No one to share the cold winters with. And there probably never would be.

Oikawa wiped the tears away roughly, angry at himself and angry at the world for taking away the best part of himself. It was unfair. But there was nothing he could do, except cherish the small moments he still held onto, the memories they had created together that were becoming hazier and hazier with each day.

But in the sharp winter air they were clear enough and Oikawa took solace in that.

_One day I will join you, Hajime. Wait for me._

**Author's Note:**

> I sat down to write something else, but this happened. Enjoy the #OikawaAngstFest2k17! Now with extras like dead!Iwa-chan.
> 
>  
> 
> [tumblr](http://mingohomo.tumblr.com/)


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